My kids are 5 and 6 and the reason I finally bit the bullet is because they both have ASD and the extra support with me being around has had some pretty drastic changes in our families lives.
But...... (and there is always a but), I find myself feeling jealous of other mums who go to work and I've especially felt jealous of my hubby going back to work this week.
Don't get me wrong I love being at home with my kids and I love that our house is more organized. But what I don't love is that I don't have a chance to escape it. We don't have the kind of kids that can easily go to friends for sleepovers.
I've always enjoyed working and felt I had a good balance with working part-time and being home part-time. Now I back to feeling confused and out of balance. I start to feel resentful that as the mum it's me who has to make the sacrifices and that everything falls too, but that puts too much pressure on me.
So that leaves me with not much available time to get a break. I do however study and I use that as my chance to get away from it all but that doesn't start again for 2 more months and I feel I need a break now.
I don't have to luxury of having my family here to help and my hubby's side of the family is so busy with kids of similar age, work and lives that we may only see them twice a year!
Now my son is in school we are making more friends who my son is building up friendships. Although Master 6 this year has been branching out to this. But Miss 5, I don't think would be ready for a long time to go to anyone's place.
I know (or at least hope) things will be different this year when she starts school and starts to make friends (again I hope, she hasn't always been good at this), I will have more time to take some me time.
So here's to the count down of school beginning and also to the countdown of uni going back in March.
Thanks for reading.